so
frustrated.
hitting my head into a wall just
so it can crack open even just a little bit just
so i can see some of what's in there see if there's
any brain in there or if it's been sucked out through
the phone that i answer every time it rings that owns me every time it rings and then
i push it to my ear and it reaches inside the words have legs they crawl up the canal they tell me what to think they take my thoughts and say there is not enough room in here this brain ain't big enough for the both of us and they push all
the pretty colors the pinksredoranges the pixie fairies and poppies and butterflies the odd clouds and clowns and cyclones and caravans that
are my dreams and fantasies
out
the other ear

it's funny how i can erase you without any
physical eraser leaving behind
not even the pink rubber flakes the thoughts and
memories and little touches that
erasers do. just close my eyes and it's
all
blank again. (fuck
where are you)